Paul Mullin admits he "couldn’t give a f*ck" about himself, with son Albi and his struggles with autism the most important thing in his life.
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Red Dragons star remains a prolific presenceCan be relied upon to deliver on the fieldFaces as many challenges off the pitchWHAT HAPPENED?
The prolific Wrexham striker has forged quite the reputation for himself in recent times, with a 47-goal haul last season helping to fire the Red Dragons to promotion back into the Football League. Mullin is a firm fan favourite in North Wales – with Ryan Reynolds and Rob McElhenney among his many admirers – but the 29-year-old is eager to point out that events and challenges away from the pitch will always be his top priority.
AdvertisementGettyWHAT MULLIN SAID
Mullin, whose famous ‘A’ hand signal goal celebration offers a nod towards his young son, has said in his new autobiography : “People say going to an autism discussion group will help me, but I’m not arsed about me. The last person I’m arsed about in this whole situation is me. I genuinely couldn’t give a f*ck about me. I care about Albi. I spend every minute thinking about how I can help him overcome barriers that he, as a child, can’t foresee. As soon as I work out he can jump one, in my head the next one appears. Sometimes the worry hits me like a cannonball. I sit on the couch and cry. Or I’ll watch him when he’s asleep and feel wave after wave of emotion. I don’t know why, because I don’t care that he’s autistic.”
THE BIGGER PICTURE
Mullin added: “What I am, though, is scared. For him, not me. Not knowing how it affects him is what I hate. Does it affect him? Does it not? Does he care? Does he not? I’m constantly trying to get inside his head and sometimes I just hit the wall. It’s as if my own head has split open and a flood of emotion has come pouring out. If one week he isn’t as vocal as the one before, I’ll feel a massive weight of guilt – it’s my fault. Those emotional episodes are necessary in a way, because when I wake up the next day I feel ready to go again. The other side of me is back – I’m on the train again. My focus is there, and it’s a positive focus. ‘You’re being stupid,’ I tell myself. ‘You spend so much time with him that you do know how he works. You know what’s inside his head.’”
GettyWHAT NEXT FOR MULLIN?
Mullin has earned plenty of plaudits for the work that he continues to do regarding autism awareness, with funds being raised for several charities. He can always be relied upon to give his all professionally, with the 29-year-old as ambitious as any other player, but there will always be more important things for him to worry about than where his next goal is coming from.
Buy your copy of Paul Mullin's brilliant new autobiography My Wrexham Story on Amazon.